Farewell, New York! My Goodbye Letter to you...

Dear New York,

It’s been 3 months, and like all good things, they must come to an end. You’ve been kind to me. I can give you that. Your people have helped me, when I’ve needed it. Not saying they always knew which direction a subway train was going in, but they’ve tried. You’ve certainly enabled me to do my work here, as you’re a city of artistic glory. A beating hub. A magnet with monumental pull. You attract talent from all over this Earth to come and ‘make it’ here. The American dream and all that comes with it. I’ve seen talent like no other. A congregation like no other. I’ve met so many artists, in particular autistic ones, which is exactly what I hoped for. It’s been amazing to see what type of spaces you have available to us. The support. I feel honoured to have visited all the galleries and pop-up spaces. To see the amazing street art beckon at me from across the sidewalk. There’s always a surprising message. For everyone has something to say in New York! For that’s what you attract, what you provoke. And freedom of speech is what you give the people. I likened the city to an artist platform; an outlet for souls with a message to the world. I hope you get heard amongst the din.

Art in unexpected places

 

Andy Warhol exhibition at the Whitney Museum - a favourite

For all the great things, come the shortfalls. Race is tense, at times. You can feel it on the surface bubbling away: how quickly people can become provoked and then how suddenly sides are taken. Even over a seemingly innocent exchange. The heat rises fast. And that’s not just the humidity of the summer heat we’re talking about. Your past is recent. People remember. The stories are unfolding and finally being told. It’s been fascinating and horrendous to learn about.

There’s a great deal of poverty and that has made me sad. The subway holds up the homeless who ride from one dead end to another. The trains can smell of sick, faeces and rotten food. It’s quite gross. But we’re all so dependent on the subway. For A-B we must go. The homeless prevails, as with many cities, large and small, around the world. I know it’s complex, so I won’t say too much on the topic, but rest assured I’ve acknowledged the issue.

The New York shoreline as the sun begins to set...

New York marathon: the most incredible event I've seen, bringing together all communities of people, in one giant street party :)

The healthcare insurance is something I think I’ll never get over. I felt like I was going back to the stone ages. I didn’t realise that not everything is covered by it and how expensive it can be. It’s the difference between surviving or not. Break or lose. Such a lottery. Yet it’s a basic human right! For any country and person. I view the NHS with completely new lens now. it’s not perfect, sure, but it’s there for you. For everyone. Like it or loathe it.

Which gave way to me thinking that you feel a little like a third world country. As I came to learn more, I understood about the lack of food safety standards and laws that the food industry abides by. Or lack of. Ps – I didn’t like your food. It was expensive and often of poor quality. And not yummy. It felt like a game of hit and miss. And I don’t like that when it comes to my basic need. Your employment rights aren’t great either. Women have less rights compared with men – just look at the maternity leave one gets. It ain’t on…

Bushwick Street Art

The vibrant streets of New York

Yet everyone wants to come and live here. Why, New York..? I was constantly gobsmacked. Sure, it’s a fun and exciting city - great for a holiday. But to live here? Yes, if you’re rich. But that applies to anywhere in the world. Yet a large proportion of people in your city are struggling. It feels like you’re at melting point. Many are living illegally. Expired visas and all that jazz. Some never have one! These stories are not uncommon, and many people work without papers. You shocked me when I first arrived, but I soon became desensitised. For it’s so tricky to come and work in the States, that it’s quite normal to find alternative ways to be.

You’re like this façade. A façade of glory that you present to the world. Yet underneath you’re rotting away. The branding is sensational, and it holds you up. But underneath you’re failing. Collapsing. How long will it take…? I feel it’s happened so slowly, gradually, that you haven’t realised it yourself. It comes down to outsiders to tell you this. But what if you’re not in New York? What if you’re in a town which is rural and far from the external influences of the world? Well, the word opiates probably means a lot to you for starters. for opiate addiction is on the rise in parts of the States. And that’s a whole other blog and a half, but it’s been happening for some time now, and what does that say about the future of the country? The Government shutdown is nearing the end of the third week as I write this. The Wall and Trump scare me in equal measures.

The amazing murals which would suddenly appear... and then there's the insane '6-layer-parking' dotted around the city

People love New York and are drawn to it. A real magnet...

New York, New York. You’ve given me a lot to consider and ponder. And I can assure you that I’m never going to forget you. You astound me, and I will always follow you - from afar. Thank you for the experience. Thank you for the learnings. Please take care. I hope you get the investment and care you need.

With love,

Mahlia x

Me in my shared studio space at Con Artist Collective

Women and Autism - My Musings

Diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome (an Autism Spectrum Disorder) three years ago, I chose to embark on a collaborative art project to explore the issues around ‘women and autism’, which I’ve covered here in ‘Women and Autism - A Collaborative Artistic Partnership’. As I’ve learnt more about the condition over the years, I’ve noticed considerable gender differences in perceptions of autism; its presentation and coping strategies between men and women – to the point where women are often misdiagnosed or undiagnosed with autism. I’ve questioned this considerably and the reasons behind it. I feel there’s certainly an increase in recognition in this field of thought, especially from those already with a fair degree of autism awareness - but not so much beyond it. For beyond it still lies a more outdated and stereotypical image of the autistic male. An update and restart are needed.

I’ve summarised my musings in my exploration to consider and understand issues around ‘women and autism’ in a piece of creative writing, with the text transcribed out below the image.

“Men. Why is autism so different in men than in women? Or is it…? Why is the male ‘form’ the accepted norm? the one where people have this ‘aha’ moment and realise that ‘yes sure, I’ve heard of this Autism business!’ and they revert back to TV shows and films. ‘Atypical’ and What’s eating Gilbert Grape’. The media conveying a one-sided view of what is. And-how-it-is. And yet missing out on what oh-so-isn’t… why is Autism so much more apparent and ‘obvious’ in men? We have a subtler presentation they say. But the most dismissive comment of all: ‘Oooh, but you don’t look (how does one look autistic anyway?) autistic.’ How dare you. a compliment you meant? Oh. I’m sorry. I didn’t realise that disregarding who I am and my total being is a compliment. For ‘so what’ if I’m autistic? Poor me…? An all cast set of male actors. Who are unlikely autistic, playing autistic men. In Science, Maths, Psychology. Historically. White men. All making inferences, studies, research, analysis – on Autism. What could they know? Or wish to consider about in female autistics? ‘Autism is Autism’ they say. Why are we misdiagnosed? Misunderstood. Undiagnosed. Why are we still playing catch-up with men? Every field. Yes, it’s unfair, blah, yes. But it’s not a whining point. If women are not being diagnosed, or misdiagnosed, their Autism is not being picked up on. Then this is a very serious point. And a subtler ‘presentation’ doesn’t mean we’re not struggling. That it’s not valid. That it’s less of an issue. That we can somehow seamlessly cope with it, because ‘we don’t look it’! We’re often over-compensating. And that’s hard work! The exhaustion, harshness, loudness, brightness. We feel this. Separate. A cultural gap. Initially misinterpreted as shy. Because women are more likely, at a societal level, to be considered shy… Bollocks. Gender differences. I am of course more than a label. More. But at the same time, this label can be helpful: liberating and empowering. And autistic women shouldn’t be left out here. Leave no-one behind they say. Well mean it.”

And it’s not just ‘women and autism’ that is the issue here either. For there are the differences that exist at a cultural and ethnic level. I’m discovering this more and more as I meet different people from the spectrum here in New York; all of whom have their various backgrounds and histories. Different school systems and state support. And the discussion and musings continue.

What are your views, if any, on ‘women and autism’? I’d be happy to hear to hear from you.

NYC: Touch-down in Brooklyn, Part I

I’ve been here in Brooklyn, New Yok, a short while now and it’s blown me away in terms of the number of impressions it has made on me. The initial one is quite simply the size: it’s a HUGE city! I always knew it would be big; American style XXXL and all that. But it’s only when you get here and start to navigate your way around the city, that you realise how quickly exhaustive it can all become, as you apply your London or other ‘big city logic’ to New York. It doesn’t quite work on the same level. I’ll let you know how that develops though, as it may just be the initial settling in period for me.

So anyway, yes, it’s a big place, but what else? Well the neighbourhood I’m living in; Crown Heights, has this intense population make-up of Jews and Afro-Caribbean’s. it’s such a contrast of behaviours I’m seeing between the two, as they live harmoniously, side by side. And the other neighbourhoods too - like in many cities, I suppose - change very quickly and are similarly made up of distinct ethnic groups. But here in NYC it feels far more striking. When I visited Brighton Beach, for instance, it was an area full of Russians and Ukrainians. To the point where Eastern European was the prominent, if not only cuisine available. They were the only languages I could hear (occasionally punctuated by English) and the signs were bilingual – in Russian and English. It was quite an extraordinary sight and feeling to witness, as I imagined them arriving into the area and then expanding to occupy it over time. Well, at least I’ve found my haven for dumplings, sautéed cabbage and potatoes, should I crave it!

My closest subway station that connects me to Manhattan and beyond: Franklin Avenue 

The area where I live is highly gentrified – you have the usual array of bars, cafes and restaurants and even museums and a botanical garden nearby 

On the whole, and despite the size of the city, I’d say it’s definitely a friendly city. I’m used to averting my eyes from people as I revert back to my ‘London ways’, however I’m always pleasantly surprised when someone greets me with a ‘good morning’ or a simple ‘hello’. And to be greeted is refreshing. A simple sign of humanity. But naturally where a city is friendly, it also has its brutally rude moments. I’ve known someone to quite literally be *shoved* out of the way at a subway station, as their ticket didn’t swipe through the first time round. I’m always surprised when I hear stories like this. It makes me reflect on what happens to a person to take this course of action; to feel this sense of entitlement over and above another human being. How and when did it start? Was it a one-off moment of impatience or are they always like this? My fascination with human behaviour! But overall, I would say it’s a friendly place, where people will smile and try to help you find your way 😊 I know I’ve been helped plenty!

And did I tell you that New York is an artist’s paradise?! My soul has been thoroughly cleansed and revived here, for there’s art and culture happening on each and every corner! And that’s one of the absolute *joys* of living here: there are pop-up galleries, one-off shows and performances – stuff that you happily and spontaneously walk past and pleasantly discover. Because that’s the only way to do it. Otherwise, you’d spend your life looking up every art and cultural event, and that’s time that no one has! And you’d never find it all anyway. For there’s always a new mural going up, an exhibition coming down, a musician setting up somewhere, a performance art piece taking place in this actual moment… So, the simple and best way is just to soak it all up and enjoy it – a very mindful approach to life, art and culture itself…

Brooklyn Museum – 5 floors of amazingness! It’s free on Thursday evenings, so no prizes for guessing where I am on a Thursday night!

New street art, I recently discovered – like I say, there’s art on every corner!

So those are my initial impressions, but there are many others that I’ve been jotting down, so do come back for Part II of this blog later this week! Until then 😊

The local streets of Crown Heights, Brooklyn

The traditional sign of America, seen in all those American movies, (as well as in Guatemala!) - the yellow school bus